Well, it’s been a damn long time since I’ve done a toilet review, but here’s a good one for you. The oh so fancy Raffles Hotel, Singapore, famous for the Singapore Sling and peanut-filled floors.
But of course, we don’t care about that sort of thing around here. We only care about the loos.
While the hotel undergoes renovation, the famous Long Bar is closed, and cocktails are being served in the Bar & Billiard Room. So it was to these lavatories that I retired when nature called.
On first impression, the toilets were pretty grand. Like the rest of the hotel, they are done in a whitewashed and spacious way that makes the space feel huge even though you’re in the middle of a very crowded city.
However, like most things in life, first impressions are rarely accurate. The loos themselves were fine, if a little dated. Everything was clean, but had the air of a space that hadn’t been updated in a long time. The lever to flush the lav was old-fashioned – nothing wrong with that – but it dribbled water out when pushed, as though it had sprung a leak.
The toilet paper was a little on the scanty side, and the door felt more like being on a ship than in a high-end hotel.
Not that I’m complaining. It’s an excellent facility, quiet, with all the necessary conveniences – except for disabled access. It’s at the bottom of a staircase, so no use if you have mobility issues.
Back in the bar, we drank our Singapore Slings and threw peanut shells onto the floor.
But of course, the question you all want answered is – and how was the Singapore Sling?
My two-word review – Don’t bother.
And here’s three more two-word reviews: Too sweet, too manufactured, too expensive.
Cheers!